Waiting For That First Check

I'm not going to lie. I forgot I had this blog. I'm not even sure if people still blog. Well, I'm going to do so, because I need to. Twitter is too toxic for me. Don't get me wrong. I've met some great people through the bird app. They are the only reason why I still have it. I've recently realized how dangerous it is for my mental health (and, for that matter, my relationships with my friends) to tweet a spur-of-the-moment missive and wait for three random people to like it and nobody to comment. It's designed to make you beg for validation that will never come. It's a drug and we know what happens when you become addicted to drugs. You crave it more and more until you become overbearing and self- loathing. It only gets worse from there. 

Maybe this blog is the rehab I need. I used to write a lot. In fact, for those of you whom I've recently met, I wrote a book. Yes, a real book. It's available on Amazon and everything. It totally sucks. No self-respecting publisher would touch my faux biography about Sean Mattea and Billie Shaw. I didn't labor over a contrived love story for the better part of two years for it to not see the light of day. Thus, I self-published. I paid Light Switch Press of Fort Collins, CO to release my book to the masses. They send your first royalty check when you hit the $50 mark. 

I'm still waiting for that first check. 

Luckily for me, this is free. Plus, this is not a one-sentence blurb that will get you crucified by a rando who disagrees with you. For all intents and purposes, it's my public diary. 

So, allow myself to reintroduce... Myself. My name is Brian. I wrote a terrible book. I tried to do voiceovers before that and never got a paying gig. I settled for a regular job. I didn't settle for the wrong woman. Instead, I found the best woman to marry - someone who loves me despite my failures. 

Maybe someday I'll get that first check. Until then, I'll break even by writing here. After all, we have an edit button.

Comments

  1. Love this. Keep it coming

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  2. More like, she loves you because of everything you are, including your failures. I can't put words in her mouth, but she seems like such a good person that I believe that's the truth. ~Karen

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    Replies
    1. Thank you Karen! You're right. We love each other because of who we are. Our faults make us both unique. We belong together.

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